Therapeutic Parenting Jumbo Cards by Sarah Neish & Sarah Dillon
Initially I wondered about the use of cards for adults but the Therapeutic Parenting Jumbo cards are fabulous.  They are designed for parents or carers who are using therapeutic parenting techniques and for professionals who are introducing others to this style of parenting. 



​These cards compliment the book ‘A quick guide to therapeutic parenting’ by Sarah Neish but can be used independently.  I would say, however, that a knowledge of therapeutic parenting would be beneficial as the cards act as useful reminders of concepts, principles and parenting techniques, but do not provide in-depth explanations or theory.

The 56 cards come in a sturdy box and are a lovely quality.  They cover a wide range of issues and topics and each card features a statement or quote from Sarah Neish’s book.  They have a cartoon picture on one side with a statement or quote relating to an element of therapeutic parenting, then on the flip side there is a more detailed but concise explanation. 

Each card is numbered and belongs one of 9 categories which are outlined in the useful booklet which comes with the cards.  Another useful and thoughtful addition is that each category is also given a separate colour, so can be easily found in the pack if you are looking for cards pertaining to a specific topic.

I like the fact that difficult issues are tackled such as why others, including family and professionals, can often sit in judgement (Category 3 ‘Ignorance Is Not Bliss: The Unhelpful Others’) or that progress is sometimes hard to see and measure (Category 6 ‘Where Did That Come From?! Progress Isn’t Always Linear).   Encouraging parenting tips are provided within each category and often come at the end of each concise explanation.

The cards are a useful tool for those times when the going is tough.  It is during times of stress when something easy to access is needed to help us to hold onto what we have learnt and why therapeutic parenting really works. You could choose some cards pertinent to what you and your child are experiencing and have them close to hand to give you encouragement.  They may also be useful to help others understand certain behaviours or difficulties a child might be experiencing. There are many different ways these cards could be used and there are suggestions in the booklet. One thing Sarah Neish points out is that these cards are for adults and I would agree with her that you may not want your child to read them as it could induce negative feelings such as shame.

Although the cards are designed for use within the field of developmental trauma they could be used for any parents who want to adopt a therapeutic approach and could be useful for children with developmental disorders such as Autism Spectrum Disorder and Attention Deficit Disorder where therapeutic parenting can really help.

I know that I will be using these cards in my work with parents and carers to help them think about some of the more difficult concepts and would recommend them for anyone working with or caring for children who have experienced developmental trauma. 
​
Lesley Bell
Therapeutic Social Worker

Play Is The Way: Child development, early years and the future of Scottish education. Edited Sue Palmer

This compact volume is a rich and engaging resource for educators, health professionals, policy makers and parents which sets out a comprehensive argument for establishing a relationship-centred and play-based education for Scotland’s under 7 year olds. Edited by Sue Palmer, who has gathered an impressive array of voices from education and health professions, the book summarises and expands the campaign of Upstart Scotland whose aims include establishing a statutory play-based ‘kindergarten stage’ for Scottish children and stressing the importance of play as a natural part of human development. 

Throughout the book, there is a thorough examination of existing Scottish guidance and legislation on early years education and care, and an overt frustration at the current mismatch between what is on paper and existing practice in nurseries and schools.
The reader will find the book divided into three sections.  The first considers ‘What we know about where we want to go’ and is a fascinating insight into the cultural and historical barriers in Scotland regarding the efficacy of play in early education.  The myth of early acceleration is skilfully outlined through examining the historical contexts that have brought about the persistent but unfounded belief that educating children as young as 4 or 5 years in the 3 Rs (Reading, wRiting and aRithmetic) is the most beneficial for later outcomes,  and that the stubborn suspicion of the validity of play is part of Scottish identity, proud of its early start to formal education. Psychological and neurobiological studies are set out to highlight how human brains are built from the bottom up ie gradually building connections on top of existing foundations of understanding so that incoming information has something to grasp onto.  Trying to accelerate this process by top-down pedagogy goes against the natural development of human brains yet the myth of starting early seems engrained not just in Scotland but throughout the UK.

Section two sets out to consider ‘How can we get to where we want to be?’ with real examples of existing projects leading the way and projected scenarios of what might be possible including harnessing the power of parents.  I was particularly drawn to the arguments for raising the status of the workforce in the early year’s arena and an emphasis on the relational experiences needed to build the foundations for literacy and numeracy before formal learning begins.  As a play therapist, I am delighted to read segments about the vital role of play for children’s social, physical and emotional development; that play is not just a fun way of learning cognitive concepts but is the fundamental language through which children first understand themselves and interact with the world.

The final section examines the wider context in which the authors’ arguments sit and the challenges ahead.  A prime block seems to be the persistence of the Scottish government to require formal assessment of P1 students (age 6 years) rather than moving towards more holistic assessments such as the Early Development Instrument (EDI) which considers social, emotional and physical developments in addition to cognitive and language developments. EDI is already used by other English-speaking countries such as Canada and Australia but has not (yet) found a place in UK education.

In the 2nd edition of this book (it had two reprints within a few months of being published in October 2020), there is a super additional chapter from Shaddai Tembo in which he challenges the often positive and idealised environment in early years settings which may be masking ongoing inequalities and not giving space for recognition of celebrating diversity in all its forms right from the start of a young child’s educational experience. Play, he argues, is a means by which young children can take flight into aspects of themselves that may be constrained in the culture of their setting.  A powerful read which comes from a standpoint of experience and compassion and is well worth a read on its own.
​
The excellent reference bank at the end demonstrates the robustness of the research related to the topic of play in early years education and in itself provides a rich source of further reading.  Whilst stemming from Scotland and referring to particular cultural and historical aspects of early education in that country, the book is of equal importance to those of us working elsewhere in the United Kingdom.  I smiled when reading that a copy was sent to every Member of the Scottish Parliament for Christmas!  Bravo to the whole team who put this gem of a compendium together during the pandemic lockdown and are keeping the momentum going for appropriate and life-enhancing early education and care. 
 
Julie McCann, London
Former primary school teacher, BAPT Play Therapist, Theraplay Practitioner, Visiting Lecturer Roehampton University

Theraplay® – Theory, Applications and Implementation edited by Rana Hong and Sandra Lindaman
​
When the latest Theraplay publication landed, I was excited to see the list of contributors. The Forward is written by Theraplay founder, Phyliss Booth, she provides the history of Theraplay. It’s followed by a Preface from Sandra Lindeman and Rana Hong, Editors. In these troubled times, it’s refreshing​ to know practitioners around the world are adapting the model to use in Covid safe ways (including virtually). Theraplay brings such joy and hope to many.

 
The body of the book is comprised of 12 chapters each focusing on a different application of Theraplay. They are well organised with introductions, key points, subsections, case studies, concluding comments, questions for reflection and references. Chapter 1 provides an overview of the Theraplay model with updated reference to Polyvagal theory, attachment theory and neuroscience.
 
I was drawn to Karen Doyle Buckwalter’s chapter 2, ‘Ghosts in the Theraplay Room – Exploring, Considering and Understanding the Impact of the Caregiver’s Own History on Theraplay Treatment’. I attended Karen ‘s training on applications of the Adult Attachment Interview last year and was fascinated to read applications of this, and other tools, in Theraplay. The chapter offers powerful insight and navigates an area my supervisees often bring to supervision.
 
I was also trained by Saara Salo and Hannah Lampi last year, authors of chapter 3, Prenatal and Infant Theraplay. The descriptions of Theraplay applied   in the prenatal phase are full of hope but also backed up by Saara et al’s own research (2019) which is outlined.
 
Chapter 4, Theraplay with Adolescents was written by my amazing supervisor, Fiona Peacock. I loved how Fiona highlighted the need to be conscious of our own cultural identity and how our attitudes and values may impact on our work and clients. Fiona brings her ideas to life through a description her own child gave growing up with a ‘Theraplay Mother’, case work about applications of Group Theraplay and using Theraplay to support a teen mother.
 
Kay Schieffer has contributed chapter 5, ‘Sunshine circles, Universal Best Practice for Young Children in Preschool Classrooms’. As well as giving a rationale for the approach, Kay provides a detailed case description showing how Sunshine Circles was used to form community and stimulate interaction.
 
Annie Kiermaier who inspired my Theraplay journey, writes about ‘Home-Based Theraplay’ in chapter 6. She highlights the thought process the family and practitioner need to consider around the possibilities of home-based Theraplay. Annie knits the realities of all of her experience into her chapter to give practitioners a true reflection of working in this way. She highlights the nuanced support the home-based practitioner may be able to offer.
 
Chapter 7 by Danielle H. Maxonight, ‘Theraplay Adaptatios for Anxiety Disorders’, focuses on the need to consider both children’s and caregiver’s anxiety as it can be intergenerational. Adaptations are described alongside a full case description (including intake).
 
Elizabeth Konrath and Eliana Gil contributed chapter 8, ‘Using Theraplay to Treat Clients of Child Sexual Abuse’. A rationale for Theraplay as an approach is provided alongside theoretical underpinnings and neuroscience related to trauma. The case description highlights the complexities of this work alongside adaptations.
 
Vivien Norris, in chapter 9, writes about ‘Using Theraplay to Help Children Who Are Moving Families’. Vivien describes how Theraplay can be used to support transitions. Vivien has developed her own training and resources (By Your Side, Norris 2019). This is discussed. Vivien outlines how the principles of her work are used within her case description.
 
Chapter 10 is written by Donna M. Gates, ‘Theraplay with families Affected by Domestic Violence’. Donna provides an overview of the impacts domestic violence can have and describes how to work with the non-offending caregiver before beginning dyadic work. A full case description is provided to illustrate Donna’s work.
 
Lauren C. Smithee writes  about ‘Adapting Theraplay for Affirmative Intervention with LGBTQ Families.’ The chapter begins with a focus on understanding the impact of minority stress and internalized stigma. There’s focus on use of terminology and a helpful glossary is provided. Lauren’s case description is of working with a 12 year old transgender girl. It highlights many different issues practitioners may encounter in this application of Theraplay.
 
The final chapter 12 is written by Alexis Greeves and Nicki Melby, “Theraplay with Children who are Deaf or Hard of Hearing’.  It outlines the need for the practitioner to understand how families identify themselves and their culture around hearing loss. Links are made again to Polyvagal theory and further work with caregivers, who may have unresolved grief around their child’s hearing loss is described. Alexis and Nicki describe specific adaptations to Theraplay for work in this context.
 
This edited collection is a fascinating read and the case illustrations bring the theory to life. It has enhanced my love for Theraplay and increased my understanding and sensitivity across a wide range of applications. I highly recommend to all practitioners and organisations with an interest in Theraplay.
 
Dr Amelia Taylor
Child and Educational Psychologist
Theraplay Practitioner and Trainer
Lifecycles Psychology

This is a book for anyone who has an interest in Theraplay, who is thinking about undertaking Theraplay  training, and most especially for those who have some years of experience in Theraplay.  It does, as they say ‘what it says on the tin’, in that it provides relevant theory, the various ways of applying practice/ theory to different ways of using Theraplay, and gives excellent examples of implementation, which I found particularly useful, as a I know my learning style is one of ‘learning by doing ‘ with an underpinning of theory that I can see/recognise as evidence.
 
Chapers are written by a number of people, which also gives a variety of voices to their contribution, with each contributor writing about how she uses Theraplay in her given specialism - and there are plenty of specialisms shared here - Prenatal and infant Theraplay, Children being prepared to transition from foster care to adoption, Sunshine Circles, Home based Theraplay, Theraplay with adolescents, Using Theraplay to treat clients who have experienced child sexual abuse, families affected by domestic violence, Theraplay adaptations for anxiety disorders, Adapting Theraplay for affirmative interventions with LGBTQ families, and Theraplay with  children who hearing impaired.
 
 I enjoyed reading this book, I found the content and the layout to be exceedingly helpful. The blend of theory and practice worked very well, as does the references to more recent experts such as Stephen Porges Polyvagal Theory, BasselVan Der Kolk’s work, as well as other known names like Fongay, Perry, Siegel and Shore.
 
The biggest message I have taken from this excellent book is the importance of getting the foundations right, i.e preparation / background work with the care giver. This being critical to effectively working with the child. As an adoption support worker, this rang true for me. My experience is often one of ‘listening and acknowledging’ a care givers own life experiences, and reflecting with them how and what is happening for them in their relationship/life regarding their child and presenting difficulties. I would strongly recommend this book as a valuable resource and practical support to practitioners using Theraplay in their work. 
 
Rita Grant
Adoption Support Manager
St. Andrew's Children's Society

Review of “Building Sensorimotor Systems in Children with Developmental Trauma: A Model for Practice” by Sarah Lloyd
 
Sarah Lloyd brings her rich experience as a Specialist Occupational Therapist and Play Therapist working in children’s mental health services to the fore in this comprehensive and passionate book for families and practitioners working with children who have experienced early adversity and trauma. 
 
Her innovative BUSS model considers that these children have not simply missed out on nurturing relationships, but also the physical movements which complement these relationships. It’s important to note that this book is not designed as a manual for treatment, but rather a number of ideas and suggestions which can be adapted to meet the needs of your own child or a child you are working with in a health or educational context. It also differentiates between the functional sensory processing disorders which are typically found in neurodevelopmental conditions and the under-developed sensory systems resulting from developmental trauma. The BUSS model fits nicely with established models of trauma and development, such as the work of Bruce Perry, Dan Hughes and Kim Golding.
 
Sarah writes in a clear and accessible manner, particularly when describing the early stages of motor development, and this is greatly supported by lovely illustrations of infants and practical examples of what these stages might look like in your own house. When considering the sensorimotor challenges which children may face in everyday life, she asks us to concentrate not just on “what” is difficult, but also “how” the child functions. There is a clear theme about the need to spend time noticing how children move and gathering information about their particular needs, before considering intervention.
 
Perhaps one of the most positive aspects of the book is the idea that these sensorimotor systems are “underdeveloped, but not broken”. Several of the chapter headings refer to “rebuilding”; that the children described within the case studies lack the essential foundations of bodily awareness and emotional regulation and thus have to exert a great deal of attention and effort to get their bodies to do what they want them to do. This empathetic perspective is crucial in placing the emphasis firmly on the need to build the capacity of these systems.
 
The book offers a range of fun activities and games which can be utilised to rebuild the various systems, such as touch, core strength and stability, taste and movement. I particularly like the focus on getting things “just right”. For example, if a child with an underdeveloped sense of touch struggles to discriminate between objects in a feely bag, an alternative suggestion is to hide objects in a bath with lots of bubbles. Sarah has clearly put a lot of thought into these hands-on activities and considered the need to take a step back and gradually increase the level of challenge.
 
While a number of case studies are referred to throughout the book, she helpfully summarises these studies in a “catch up” chapter later on; outlining the key points from each child’s assessment, the kind of activities used in the first four weeks of intervention and the initial review with the child’s parents. The fact that the final part of the book is dedicated to parents’ own experiences of applying the model - offering a range of top tips from everyday practice - means that we finish as we started: with a hopeful and optimistic perspective about growth and rebuilding.
 
Dr Christopher Moore
Educational Psychologist

Theraplay® The Practitioner's Guide by Vivienne Norris and Dafna Lender 
 
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I was really excited to read Theraplay The Practitioners Guide by Vivien Norris and Dafna Lender as I found and continue to find Parenting with Theraplay really useful and I wasn’t disappointed.

The book starts with a description of the Theraplay Guiding Principles and beautifully describes what makes it such a powerful intervention, the reader is taken through the underlying principles with great attention to detail and practical explanations linked to the theory underpinning them. 

I think the short paragraph describing the simple Mantra of Theraplay attitude  ‘NO hurts, stick together, have fun and the adult is in charge’ gives a simple and memorable framework that those at the beginning of their theraplay journey will find invaluable and for those further in their journey a helpful reminder of what theraplay is.

The dimensions are helpfully described and I love the inclusion of considering raising the need to think about cultural differences between ourselves and our families and the different way they can impact and the exploration of adaptations needed for older children, physical or cognitive limitations, gender etc.  Not every situation can be listed but it’s helpful to raise this need especially in the UK as my experience has been that adaptation of some description has invariably been needed in my work with families.

The table which constitutes the summary at the end of this chapter is a really helpful quick reminder of what the practitioner needs to hold in mind in different situations in sessions, the explanations illustrate key pointers for good practice clearly based on the theoretical principles underlying.  It will be an invaluable resource to dip into for a quick reminder both prior to sessions and afterwards when reviewing the video footage and I think will be invaluable in helping one think through where their practice can be improved.

I loved the chapter called Nuts and Bolts which takes you step by step through using Theraplay, as well as giving the ideal practice it helpful raises questions that help to identify where adaptations are needed and the examples used illustrate the points made clearly.  It was great to see how the importance of the therapist relationship with the parents is highlighted and the challenges that this can bring. Again there were great examples which really bring the theory to life such as the importance of a simple as a cup of tea in offering nurture and building relationship.

It really feels as though you have someone walking besides you as you read through the steps that lead to your first theraplay session.   Again the joy is in the detail of the writing and the thoughtful examples used that illustrate the work so well.  The careful consideration given to each step makes it seem so simple but the practicalities and the theory are written in such a way that they prompt both the new and experienced practitioner to be thoughtful about their practice and remind you how complex this intervention is when it is truly delivered.   The decisions made at each stage of the work from the parent feedback, the sessions themselves to the importance of working with parents and the challenges this can bring are worked though so that the reader gets a real sense of what’s needed from them.

The chapter titled Theraplay Outtakers and Bloopers – What No One Ever Told You is great encouragement to us all and illustrates how we all learn from practicing and how important it is to never stop looking at the detail when preparing our sessions or feedback or examining what we did.  That we all get it wrong sometimes but if we remember the Theraplay Mantra it will be okay.
The examples illustrate that there’s always learning, that the best plans need adaptation, that children can be unpredictable, the need for safety and the practicing with theraplay attitude are illustrated again and again and how using the theraplay guiding principles allows what can feel like failure to be turned round to positive experiences for parent and child. 

Part 3 looks at Becoming a Theraplay Practitioner and It is helpful to have such a detailed look at what it means to become a theraplay practitioner, what one needs to consider if one wants to takes one’s practice forward.  The challenges that one might face and how to think about them within the context of theraplay.

There’s a super chapter on the supervision process, the practicalities of supervision as well as what might come up personally and the process required to become certified is fully explained.

There are very helpful examples of supervision forms which will be invaluable to those considering whether qualification is the right path for them as well as invaluable for those that in the process of qualifying.

And finally a wonderful array of resources to further support those working with theraplay.  I was so pleased to see the inclusion of how to work with Sensory regulation and the adapations that might be needed.  And it is helpful to have a chapter addressing the need for reflective dialogue in some cases and to have examples of where it can and has been useful.

There is such strength in this book in that it clearly supports workers drawing on all the tools in their tool box to enhance their Theraplay Practice.  The illustrations of where its important and indeed vital to look at adaptations are well illustrated and I think will give workers confidence to ask the questions they need to ask and go looking for answers in how best to meet the needs of their families.

And just to finish - I loved this statement. ‘This does not mean that the relationship will be without its difficulties because therapeutic work is hard , but if we attend to the rupture and repair cycle that happens within relationships, this gives us a strong basis to move forward’

I often talk to parents about how rupture in relationship with their child is not the end of the world but can be seen as an opportunity to repair and deepen attachment.  And I love that theraplay is about relationship and if we can show parents how to rupture and repair successfully not only do we strengthen the trust and strength of their working relationship with us but we also see them  grow in capacity and stretch themselves further than they ever thought possible.

I would recommend this book to anyone wanting to develop their theraplay practice.  It will be invaluable to those at the beginning of their journey with Theraplay and also a lovely refresh for those of us that have been practicing for some time.  It is full of wisdom as well as a ton of practical tools to support practice.  I know that I will be re-visiting it again and again.


​I did my Level 1 Training in London at the beginning of 2010 and immediately loved it and started using it in my work. I used the games in  groups for new adoptive parents and in my direct work with families as part of my role as Children’s worker at Scottish Adoption. In 2013 I did my Level 2 and realised that I needed to start formalising the work I was doing, using MIMs and being more structured with my parent and Child work.  I started talking to Fiona Peacock at this point although it wasn’t until Feb 2016 that I started my Foundation Level.  Fiona is still my go to person for supervision and my Mid-term report for my Intermediate has been on hold since I took on the Practice Manager Role at Scottish Adoption in 2018 – my New Year’s resolution is to complete Intermediate this year. 
 
Fiona Peacock has been working with us an organisation since 2017 and has been invaluable in supporting the understanding and use of theraplay principles in our work.  All our Senior Practitioners are trained to Level 1.  Our adopters are introduced to Theraplay games in prep group, again after approval on our Practical skills for Attachment Training day and post placement in our group programme.  Additionally we use MIMs for all families looking for After Adoption support – its invaluable as an assessment tool and parents are very positive about the process. 
 
I love theraplay - for me it’s a great fit both with me personally and the other tools that I use in my work and through Fiona’s support my practice is growing.  I look forward to dipping into The Practitioners Guide by Vivien Norris and Dafna Lender as part of my Theraplay journey going forward – I can see that it will be invaluable.
 
Julie Connaway
Practice Manager
Scottish Adoption

Theraplay® The Practitioner's Guide by Vivienne Norris and Dafna Lender 
 
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​Anyone interested in Theraplay® will know how difficult it is to find Theraplay® Institute approved information and activities. It can also be a challenge for people who use Theraplay® within their wider practice to get appropriate supervision for the Theraplay aspects of their work. In both areas Norris and Lender’s book is an invaluable resource.

It is a book packed full of reflection, imagination, problem solving and trouble shooting. The case studies are particularly helpful; they feel real, with honest acknowledgement by the therapists of their own countertransference, defences and complex feelings. They also highlight without any blame or shame how difficult it is for some children and parents to adapt to news ways of relating.  
 
One of the complexities of Theraplay® is that it looks incredibly simple in theory but can be remarkably difficult to practice with efficacy. The authors have considered numerous challenges for the newly qualified and perhaps even the more experienced practitioner, from choosing sequences of activities that allow the therapist to stay relaxed while the child remains engaged, to working with complex parents and understanding and supporting children with deeply challenging forms of resistance, anxiety and control. In fact, in many ways, this is a treasure chest of support for anyone working with children and families, even those who are not Theraplay® trained. By that I mean the Theraplay® attitude and perspective provide a great model of engagement and relational connection that has a true attachment-in-action focus .
 
The book packs in a lot of reading, helpfully structured into five sections.
Part 1 covers the overarching principles of Theraplay® and places it firmly within the context of trauma and attachment theory, dyadic developmental psychotherapy, social engagement theory and neurobiological research.

Part 2 is entitled Nuts and Bolts. I found this “troubleshooting” section particularly valuable. It deals with the “lived experience of engaging in Theraplay®”, answering many questions that I’ve never seen addressed anywhere else. It illustrates the real complexities of using the apparently simple activities in depth with traumatised children and their parents. All too often we focus on challenging children and fail to prepare for the parent work. The authors consider the skills needed for parent work and the challenges of engaging complex parents who could (often unconsciously) sabotage work with the child. As it says on the tin – the nuts and bolts!

Part 3: Becoming a Theraplay® practitioner is a much shorter section, obviously of particular interest to anyone consider training in the approach, trainees and new therapists. Again, although clearly focused on Theraplay®, it also addresses many aspects of supervision that would be of interest to therapists of other creative disciplines who work with children and their parents.

Part 4: examples of completed supervision forms looks at the MIM-based assessment form and shows examples of completed supervision forms, plus a final evaluation supervision form, complete with feedback. It is a practical section that should leave you in no doubt about the meticulous detail required in the paperwork. This detail is made possible through the use of video recording sessions and playing them back so that therapist, parent and supervisor can view the detail of interactions, proving yet again the power of the most subtle relational exchanges in creating connection or disconnection.

Part 5 is the resources section. It includes session plans for different types of clients, a guide for parents, including handouts with checklists to help parents see what the four dimensions look like within the parent-child relationship.  It’s also great to see a section on sensory regulation and children’s tolerance of touch.  As you would expect there is an updated list of Theraplay® activities. I had mixed feelings about this section. It was good to see the guidance for different age groups, but I tend to find the description of Theraplay® activities brief and often vague. Also, no group activities are included. These are small quibbles in an otherwise super resource. I have no doubt that this will be the Theraplay® bible for years to come. 

​Sheila Lavery

​“Gilly the Giraffe Self Esteem Activity Book" by Dr Karen Treisman.

Another attractive cover which invites you and children into the book.  Very accessible and comprehensive. The graphics instantly suggest this is a child-friendly resource.  As with Neon the Ninja, plenty of activity sheets which can be photocopied.
​
Exploring this resource I held in mind the children I primarily come across in my role as a Social Worker in a Family Placement Team.  Self-esteem is something which many of these children lack significantly as a result of their early experiences, poor attachment relationships and trauma.

There is a broad spectrum of strengths-based activities within the book – some more cognitive and also many creative and sensory focussed resources with which children affected by poor attachment and developmental trauma could more easily engage.

The story of Gilly the Giraffe explores the message that we are all unique, its ok to be different and it’s important to notice and celebrate the positive things about ourselves and to believe the positive feedback from others.

Many children and adults find it difficult to see the positives in themselves.   Children affected by developmental and relational trauma even more so.
The story is easy to follow and engage with.  It’s important to read the story to your child before embarking on any of the activities so that your child has an understanding of the message.

The structure of Gilly the Giraffe resource is the practically the same as that of Neon the Ninja in that it begins with the story, then provides some activities which are fun, some further,  more in depth activities, and the Adults Guide which has some additional activities.

It’s important to read through the book and familiarise yourself with the activities.  However, you shouldn’t commence using the activities until you have read through and understood the information, advice and guidance within the Adult Guide.

Once the story is familiar to your child the parent, carer or professional should explore their own relationship to praise and positive feedback.  Dr Triesman, in the Adult Guide section emphasises how important it is for the adult to have awareness of this prior to instigating any activities with their child.  This provides an understanding of expectations or bias.

The activities within the Gilly the Giraffe resource range from more cognitive exercises e.g. sentence completion and thinking about situations to more creative activities involving making things, drawing, collages and more sensory based strategies which asks the child to associate positives with smell, taste, touch, sound, sight.  I liked the activities which look at a childs’ various “parts” like the “Russian dolls” exercise and the positive puzzle person.  It brought to mind “parts language” developed by Holly van Gulden (Adoption Counsellor, Author and trainer/consultant), which begins with noticing positive parts and accepts that we also have some less positive parts AND that we are still the same person.
The activities provide strategies for noticing, appreciating and celebrating positives and storing up positive feelings and thoughts which the child is encouraged to remember when things are tricky e.g. another child saying mean things.

Some activities focus on encouraging success and optimism for the future and ask the child to explore their hopes and dreams.

As with Neon the Ninja, the activities and exercises are not prescriptive or exhaustive.  Tools and strategies are provided which can be adapted and added to depending on the needs of the individual child.

Time can be taken over how the resource is used.  The story can “stand alone” or can be used in conjunction with whatever activities are appropriate.
Dr Treisman makes it clear that the parent, carer, professional should know and be attuned to the child and have a trusting relationship with them prior to embarking on the activities so that the child feel safe to explore the issues through the tools in the book.   The child requires to be regulated and calm so they are in a “thinking and learning space”.  The Guide explains that issues of self-esteem and obstacles to accepting praise and positive feedback need to be assessed and understood for each child.

There is a helpful and comprehensive section in the Adult Guide which determines that the adult should explore their own position, experiences and biases.  There is clear explanation as to how this impacts on the adult’s capacity to support the child and enable them to model thinking and feelings.   There are helpful questions to ask yourself in order to explore this.
I liked how the Guide provides exploration of the reasons why children struggle with poor self-esteem and how negative self-esteem develops including poor early experiences, domestic violence, neglect, abuse and trauma.  It also suggests how we parent or are parented impact on our capacity to believe in ourselves including blaming, shaming, rejection, being ignored, positive affirmation and how these are internalised, creating a negative cycle.

There are lots of helpful strengths-based suggestions, tools and strategies for children, particularly those who find it difficult to hear praise and identify positives about themselves and believe the positive feedback they receive from others.

The guide explores barriers to positive self-esteem including cultural, familial and generational differences in how we view praise and positive feedback.
All in all, this resource is extremely comprehensive and accessible.  Some adults may find exploring their own history and position with regard to praise and positives quite challenging and may require some support to do this in a safe way.

There are clear challenges working with children affected by developmental and relational trauma, however Dr Treisman acknowledges this and provides additional strategies whilst emphasising the need to “know the child” and take it at the child’s pace.

The scope of this resource means you can dip into it and adapt the wide range activities which fit with the child you have in mind.

Many of the activities are fun and creative and provide opportunities for conversations, expanding these conversations and enhancing connection with the child.  

This resource would be helpful to use in schools, as with Gilly the Giraffe, with groups of children as well as individuals.  Of course it would be important to have knowledge of how each child managed praise and positive feedback.   It would be an effective resource to promote inclusion and diversity and provide opportunities for individual children to feel noticed, heard and valued.
I tried a couple of the activities out with my 11 year old daughter.   She found some of the sentence completion activities more/less fun and enjoyed some of the more visual, creative exercises. 

I would want to use this as a resource with families in a systemic way which would allow exploration of how the adults manage praise and support modelling to the children in the family.

A valuable and comprehensive resource which clearly explores the issues.  Some parents or carers may benefit from support to explore their own position prior to initiating activities with their child.

Shona Thain, Family Placement Social Worker
(and my 11 year old daughter, Jenna)

Neon the Ninja Activity book for Children who struggle with sleep and nightmares by Dr Karen Treisman”

When I was asked to take a look at this resource, I felt it would be really helpful to seek the views of a friend, Liz Innes (retired Home Link Worker) who is a Sleep Scotland counsellor, parent and grand-parent.  I also engaged the services of my 11 year old daughter, Jenna to “test drive” it.
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So, instantly, the cover of the book suggests that children will engage with this colourful character Neon the Ninja.  The visuals throughout the book are excellent.   On a practical note, the activity sheets can be photocopied.  It would be great if they could be downloaded and printed off as required – or the book came with a spiral spine to make it easier to photocopy.   This is a very accessible and comprehensive book.
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I have used a variety of resources in my role as a front line Social Worker including workbooks and activity sheets – some of which can be basic, a bit too cognitive, or open to interpretation.  Most children with developmental trauma, gaps in early development and poor capacity, find it difficult to engage in more cognitive activities.   It is primarily through this lens that I explored Neon the Ninja.

There are indeed some such cognitive activities within the book, however, there are also many sensory focussed resources with which children affected by poor attachment and developmental trauma could more easily engage.
What I particularly like about the book is it’s optimism and hopefulness – predicting success – that things will get better and the nightmares will go away.   I also liked the activities which “rescript” the nightmares – changing the narrative which accepts that a child has nightmares for a reason AND that the child can have some control over how their fears are played out.

I agree that, as Dr Treisman explains, the reasons behind or causes of nightmares will differ from child to child, and this needs to be explored carefully prior to embarking on using the tools and resources within the book.  However, there is a comprehensive and varied range of activities and options which can be tailored to suit individual children depending on age, developmental age, experiences, circumstances, trauma and capacity.
Giving a sense of agency to the child about how they can be instrumental in banishing their nightmares empowers the child, particularly when supported by a trusted, attuned adult.   I was curious about whether some (developmentally) younger children might be expecting Neon the Ninja to be “real” and to actually materialise before their eyes to help – that bit about not being able to separate fantasy and reality – so this may need a conversation at the start.   Parents and carers need to walk it their child’s shoes and be able to communicate at their child’s developmental level.  The idea of course is that the child themselves becomes their own nightmare ninja.

Parents and carers need to be supported to validate their child’s fears from wherever they originate.   Validation/acceptance is key in the first place, lots of empathy and curiosity and of course where appropriate – the playfulness (PACE – Dan Hughes). 

The activity book should be parent/carer/professional lead rather than the child themselves, working through the book.  The activities are useful in supporting parents and carers to connect to and to build closer, trusting and secure relationships providing the child with the feeling that those caring for them can keep them safe.   Where a child does not have this kind of relationship with their parent or carer, some work would require to be done initially or alongside to facilitate this eg Theraplay.

What the book does well is offer the tools to open up opportunities for conversations with children and supporting them to share their worries.  This in itself is an important process.

Many of the activities provide opportunities for conversations and expanding discussion.   Some in a more creative way by encouraging the child to draw, colour or make something which would help chase away the nightmares.   Again, this gives the child capacity to influence the outcome/change/story.   The activity in itself when done alongside a primary attachment figure/trusted adult creates connection, safety and security.

The book begins with the story of who Neon the Nightmare Ninja is and what he does.  The story provides a sense of empowerment to the child and reassurance that someone is there to help and that the nightmares can be conquered with the help of a trusted adult.  Neon is not along and teams up with his friends.   He has a treasure chest full of lots of creative tools, tricks and suggestions for how to conquer your nightmares in different ways.

Once children become familiar with the story it can be followed up with some fun activities to do with the child which gently and creatively introduces them to Neon and opens conversations about their worries and fears and provides that sense of empowerment.  There are some more relaxing and calming activities to help with the feelings and sensations evoked by the worries and fears which involve some more sensory and mindful resources and strategies.  So it’s a bit of a pick and mix – one size doesn’t fit all – so it’s important that you know your child.

The Guide for Adults in the last section of the book, is very thorough, clearly set out, encouraging and helpful.  It should be read thoroughly prior to embarking on any of the activities.  As I worked my way through the Activity section of the book I paid attention to the range of tools and activities, holding in mind children with developmental trauma and gaps in early attachment development – wondering which activities would be most helpful for them (the more sensory activities) and which they would find difficult to engage with (ie the more cognitive activities).   Dr Karen Treisman sets out very clearly throughout the book, what to hold in mind when using this resource – about which I was really appreciative.

I was extremely impressed with the Adult Guide section.   Dr Treisman goes to great lengths to confirm that “one size doesn’t fit all” and that each child is unique and comes with their own experiences.  She emphasises the need to know your child and know their nightmare(s) before you are able to assess which resources are most appropriate.   She helpfully suggests that any of the tools can be adapted or tailored as required and gives examples of what this could look like.  There is solid exploration and advice around the many issues which cause children to have nightmares and how the impact of nightmares themselves, and the fear of having the nightmares, materialises and affects the individual child.

Dr Treisman reminds those adults using the resource to ensure that the child is supported to experience safety and provides various strategies for creating this in terms of both physical and emotional safety and space.

I was pleased to see a separate section devoted specifically to children affected by relational and developmental trauma.   She explains the impact of i.e. abuse, neglect, bereavement, trauma, domestic violence, bullying.   She explores how memories and flashbacks can be triggered by a range of experiences particularly of a sensory nature ie smells, sounds, temperature, colours, time of day and so on, and discusses how children affected by early trauma may respond when in a state of fear ie flight, fight, freeze and become extremely dysregulated.

She re-iterates how, before addressing the child’s nightmares, the adults involved require to carry out a “whole-child, trauma-informed assessment”.   If found this very encouraging.

This resource provides a range of child-focussed, fun and friendly ways to explore their nightmares and find ways to share their anxieties, whilst providing the tools to empower them to believe they can do something, in the safety of their relationship with a trusted adult, to banish their nightmares. 
Helpful suggestions and ideas are provided as to how to encourage a child to engage, items and materials and methods which can be used in the activities including many which are sensory-based eg massage, music, scents and oils, snuggle toys and blankets, transitional objects.  Methods for rescripting, creating new narratives, changing the outcomes using visualisation, guided meditation etc are also explained giving clear circumstances in which these would be helpful.

Each section of the Adult Guide tells you which activities within the book are relevant.  Lastly, the Guide suggests how to measure success and keep a record so you know what works and how to proceed.  The Guide contains prompts and instructions for the adult to reflect, read over, and review what they have learned.

I really enjoyed exploring this resource.  It provides for individual children with a range of experiences and clearly explains when, why and how to use the activities/tools.  Although the book is aimed at children aged 5-10, it could be tailored for older children and teens,  particularly those functioning at a younger developmental age. 

Parents, carers and professionals would find this book a useful resource in helping with sleep related issues and nightmares.  It may be that some parents may require support to have the confidence to understand and use the resource.
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The book, whilst focussed on supporting children to overcome their fears and deal with nightmares, I believe has a broader application in supporting children, whether affected or not by early experiences of trauma,  to manage fears and anxiety in general.

Both myself and my friend Liz (Sleep Scotland counsellor), were impressed with the depth of the resource and the scope of activities provided.  My daughter, Jenna, who always likes to help try out resources, really thought the book was fun and helpful.   So thanks to Liz and Jenna for their valuable contributions.
Get the book – its great!

Shona Thain, Family Placement Social Worker
In consultation with Liz Innes, Sleep Scotland Counsellor, and my 11 year old daughter, Jenna

“A Therapeutic Treasure Deck of Sentence Completion and Feelings Cards" 
(Therapeutic Treasures Collection) 
by Dr Karen Treisman
 
When I first received the Therapeutic Treasure Deck and had a quick flick through the cards, I have to confess I felt a wee bit cautious. 
​On reflection,  I think perhaps this was because I was busy with other stuff at work and that I have seen many different versions of “feelings cards” over the 23 years I’ve been a Social Worker.  So decided I would proceed with my cautious part! 

I would also just say that I haven’t (so far) read Dr Treisman’s “Therapeutic Treasure Box” book.  However, I was reassured that it wasn’t necessary to do so in order to use the Deck.

So actually, all it took was to read through the instruction booklet accompanying the Deck.  I began to feel rather curious about the possibilities of the cards, replacing my previous caution.

I like the cards themselves – the feel of them and the illustrations - I found myself wondering about children who would experience the Deck as a means of helping them connect with and communicate their feelings and story.  I quickly found myself connecting the application of the cards to DDP/PACE and Theraplay.

As a Social Worker in a small Family Placement Team, my role involves supporting families to build connections and attachment relationships with the children they care for and parent.  And it is important we acknowledge that parenting and caring for children with developmental trauma and attachment difficulties is not easy, particularly when children are resistant to our attempts. 

I chose to use the Deck with a 10 year old child to see how I could use them to connect.  I was curious - would they like them?   What sense would they make of them?  Would using the cards help them feel safe enough to communicate their feelings, hopes, wishes and fears?  Would it help me as a worker understand what they were communicating?  Lots of questions.

This child was immediately curious about the cards.   She was able to engage with them and recognise many of the feelings images. The cards provided opportunities for conversations about the less usual ones.  Exploring the cards, the child was able to verbalise what was going on in the image eg how is the swan keeping the cygnets safe?  Why do they need to be safe?   What might make them “not safe”?  She was able to reflect using her own words about when she feels safe and not safe, and what makes her feel safe when she is frightened.

She appeared relaxed about being able to choose and talk about what was on the cards.  This then lead us into talking about eg what the animal was feeling which flowed into how and when the child might experience this emotion.  It was helpful to use the sentence completion cards alongside the feelings cards which helped to fill in gaps in the stories.  Whilst using the cards I was mindful of the PACE attitude – using Acceptance, Curiosity, Empathy and, where appropriate, playfulness.

One of my colleagues used the cards with a 14yr old who finds it difficult to explore and talk about her feelings.  The worker found the cards helpful both for the young person, who was able to choose the cards she connected best with, and also for the worker in helping to notice also which cards the young person was avoiding.  The young person was able to check out with the worker what they (the worker) would feel/think/do or say.  The young person was also able to reflect on what her parent might feel.   There was exploration with the young person as to what they were experiencing/feeling eg a year ago, and what is different now – opening up further conversations and about what might happen in the future.   This young person finds it difficult to sustain conversations, so, with the cards, she felt she had some control over how long to spend on each and how much reflection was manageable for her.

The worker in this case felt that using the cards took the pressure off the young person in having to sustain an intense, one-to-one, conversation with another.   This particular young person asked if the worker could bring the cards back again.  The worker’s experience was that the cards opened the possibility of further explorations next time they meet.

The Therapeutic Treasure Deck lends itself to working with individuals, groups and families and it connects well with other approaches.  As I experienced, they can be used effectively alongside the attitude of PACE (Playfulness; Acceptance; Curiosity; Empathy).

The child or young person can have some control over which cards they wish to look at and talk about, without the pressure of having to answer direct questions.  They can control the pace, the choice of card, how much they wish to talk about, and how to connect with their own experiences, which is especially helpful for children with a limited emotional vocabulary.  I like the idea also of encouraging the child or young person to expand on what appears on the cards by drawing, painting, colouring and using other media like playdoh. 

Using the cards opens up all sorts of creative possibilities of how to use them to connect and communicate effectively with the child.  They can be tailored to the individual child or young person’s needs.  They help us to go at the child’s pace. 
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Using the cards keeps conversations open and engaged, letting the child or young person know you are interested in them.  You are noticing what they find tricky and you are alongside them, acknowledging with them that some of this stuff is hard.  Using the cards provides the worker with a raft of information about the child without using checklists or questions – including why they might be avoiding particular cards.  It helps us as workers notice what might be under the surface - what’s behind a child’s fears and anxieties and presenting behaviours, and what might help the child to manage the things they find hard to manage. 

The Therapeutic Treasure Deck creates opportunities to help children connect and make sense of their own story and to begin be open to the possibility that the adults who care for them can help them and accept and love them.   I will be sharing the Deck with my colleagues in the Family Placement Team here as well as generally within Children’s Services.

In conclusion - I have moved from having a rather large cautious part to having developed a rather inspired part!   I am in fact a total convert!  I really like the Therapeutic Treasure Deck and will most definitely be using it with the children and families I support.  So my advice would be – pick them up and give it a go!

Shona Thain
Social Worker (Family Placement Team)
and Adoptive Parent

Parenting with Theraplay®
- Understanding Attachment and How to Nurture a Closer Relationship with Your Child by Vivien Norris and Helen Rodwell.

Forewords by Phyllis Booth and Dafna Lender, illustrated by Miranda Smith

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I love this book for so many different reasons!  It unpicks Theraplay - a complex, but really useful tool that has been tried and tested in the professional arena.  We see Theraplay introduced for all families wanting to better their relationships, whatever their challenges. It makes it accessible to the key people in children’s lives – their parents, carers, grandparents etc.  It speaks directly to these adults that children need as the “bigger, stronger, wiser and kind” people they can feel safe and connected with.  The book provides just the right amounts of the Theraplay principles of structure, engagement, nurture and challenge in the text and illustrations. This makes the model something we can make our own in our families. 

The first part of the book explains the history, theoretical development and research that underpin Theraplay. It explains why it is needed in some families and how it works. It begins to show why “returning to early and simple ways of playing together is like building up the foundations of your relationship.” Key concepts such as attachment, safe base and emotional regulation are explained, if you want this level of knowledge; likewise, the importance of touch and creating “moments of meeting”. Theraplay is based on what happens in healthy interaction between carers and their infants/babies and the elements that make up these interactions - Structure, Engagement, Nurture and Challenge - are fully explored. Helpfully, each section and each chapter has the same format and is introduced, chunked into bite sized bits and then summarised, so that you can pick out what is useful to you right now. Every section is full of suggestions of what you can do to shift the way you interact with your children. There are scenarios and check lists to help you think about your internal life and that of your children and many ideas about what to do to support your relationships. There are loads of examples of things you can do in daily living situations and well as games for more specific play time. What I found particularly helpful is that while illustrating each relational element and aspect that makes up Theraplay there is as much support for parents – possible ways to practice, to find the way forward, to have their own needs met etc – as advice on how they can support their children.

The second part of the book looks at the stressors of daily living that our children often need help with, whatever their age. It also looks at some of the behaviours that are the outwards signs of our children’s response to these and more complex causes of overwhelming stress. Just how the principles and practice of Theraplay can help address these difficulties are discussed in a warm, empathetic conversational tone. You feel as though the authors are really alongside you and your children.

I think that this book successfully conveys the “being” and the “doing” nature of Theraplay. It gives so many ideas to work on, practice and adapt so that we can get to know so much more about ourselves and our children. It empowers us to find our way to safer, repairable , fun and joyful relationships.

Roberta Manners 
Mother, Adoptive Mother, Grandparent, Certified Theraplay Practioner and Trainer.
 
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FOR THOSE ATTENDING THE THERAPLAY TRAINING IN EDINBURGH AND THE THERAPLAY CONFERENCE IN LEICESTER IN SEPTEMBER 2017 - THIS BOOK WILL BE AVAILABLE AT A DISCOUNTED PRICE!!!

DON'T MISS 'MEET THE AUTHORS' BOOK SIGNING AT THE THERAPLAY CONFERENCE

The Little Book of Messy Play by Sarah Featherstone

The Little Book of Messy Play has long been a favourite publication for all practitioners involved in the area of early years education.

The book provides a range of suggestions for play using a number of creative methods to engage all the senses. Many of the activities described are useful not only for professionals involved with children but also for parents and carers who are needing inspiration to provide play which entertains and stimulates a range of age groups and abilities. 

The activities included not only promote communication and language skills but also promote gross and fine motor skills and the development of social and emotional skills. Although primarily aimed at 0-5 year olds, I believe the projects are easily adapted and transferable for older children; particularly those who have missed out on key developmental stages and would benefit from the opportunity to ‘catch up’ on early life experiences. The chance to regress and get messy, mucky and dirty can be irresistible and can reignite the inner child in us all.

Our own personal family favourite, which captivated two 2 year old girls, was “Catch a Creature”. We have already discussed our plans to recreate this at the beach and have talked about how we might adapt the concept (my word, not theirs) for Halloween by making scary green and orange jelly complete with edible worms!

My only minor criticism would be the use of a safe outside space is desirable. However, that aside, many of the activities suggested could provide the inspiration for a range of summer projects and could be put to good use at a Family Fun day or organised Summer event. Enjoy!

​Catriona Walker

Keeping the Little Blighters Busy: 50 refreshingly different things to do with your kids before they're 12 3/4 by Claire Potter 

This is a great book to dip into for ideas on how to encourage play, and spend fun time with the children - or set them off and leave them to it!

​Bright and accessible, it gives a range of imaginative activities that cost little or nothing to set up and enjoy, and which are fun and exciting - it is not just another things to do with sticky-backed plastic sort of read.

In fact, it is brilliant book for parents who need more ideas on what to do with their kids and how to encourage imaginative playtime. It is aimed at ages 3-13, though the adults will have as much fun as the kids when joining in on many of the activities. 

The book is divided into sections making it easy to home in on the solution you need, or you can flip through it and pick up something that catches your eye - I particularly liked the “if you like this you could look at page…”  footnotes.

I found the suggestions imaginative but simple to set up, and applicable to all sorts of situations – rainy days at home, creative stuff in the garden, walks in the park or round the neighbourhood, new takes on Halloween and Christmas, all at low or no cost and generally easy to set up.  

The author also give a little bit of background as to how she came up with the idea, which rounds the book out. All in all it was an inspiring and warm hearted read, I will definitely be trying out a few of these activities with my 2 boys.

Ruth F, Adoptive parent

Yoga Games for Children. Fun and Fitness with Postures, Movements, and Breath
by Danielle Bersma & Marjoke Visscher

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Namaste and welcome to our yoga games book review! 

I was ably assisted in this review by two small volunteers aged 4 and 7, who agreed (a TV bribe was admittedly involved) to test out the ‘yoga games’ from this book with me. 

The authors suggest working through a series of the games, beginning with breathing, then yoga postures and relaxation, providing a structure which is similar to that of an adult yoga class. The games are designed for children between 3 and 12 with age recommendations for each game. We managed 40 minutes in all, which was far longer than I would have anticipated, especially as early notices were mixed.

“Yoga’s not my thing, I don’t like it!”

We started with a few breathing exercises, the most popular of which was ‘Blowing Leaves’ which as the name suggests, encourages  awareness of the breath travelling in the body by blowing leaves around the room. A good storm ensued. We then tried ‘Animal Sounds’ and running around making a bee noise was also popular so we had a go at ‘Feeling Sounds Through the Back’ with the children sitting back-to-back and taking turns to try and to feel the resonance of one another’s singing or talking. Both declared they could hear the noises ‘in my ear’ so possibly this one needs some practice!

Moving on to poses, the  control needed for the ‘Cobra’ proved difficult, but more light-hearted exercises with suggestions to make the noise of a lion or make a funny face were met enthusiastically and we all especially enjoyed ‘The Sun Salutations for Children’ which included the instruction to ‘try to look silly’. A passing Granny was even successfully co-opted to this exercise. The sun salutations were great fun despite the clouds in the sky outside, and our 7 year old reviewer had learnt the sequence off by heart after a few turns.

Another surprising highlight was ‘Tree’ pose, which initially both children became very frustrated by. But with some gentle hand-holding for balance and a wee bit of patience they eventually really enjoyed gaining mastery of balancing on one leg. We needed a lie-down after all that work… The relaxation exercise ‘White Light’ was thoroughly resisted by the ever-fidgety 7 year old present, 

“I didn’t really enjoy that!”

But greatly enjoyed by Granny at the end of a long day and by our 4 year old reviewer who reported, 

“I actually did feel a white light in me!”

The book is simply laid out and easy to use and adapt to a range of situations and ages. It is primarily aimed at group-work or school settings but even with our very small group we still had a huge amount of laughs. The focus is very much on having fun and enjoying the movements. There are also lots of opportunities for children to talk about how the exercises feel and to develop physical and emotional self-awareness through them. Several games employ the cotton wool balls familiar from Theraplay® games, so these could easily be introduced with a Theraplay® game or two. Just choosing a few yoga games and having fun with them was a lovely way to spend a wet summer evening.

This months review comes from Ariane Critchley, a Senior Practitioner in Scottish Adoption's After Adoption team.

THESE REVIEWS ORIGINALLY APPEARED ON THE SCOTTISH ADOPTION WEBSITE AND ARE REPRODUCED WITH PERMISSION

The Confusing World of Brothers, Sisters and Adoption By Regina. M .Kupecky
 
This simple to read workbook is the 3rd in a series of workbooks based on 'The Adoption Club' , a fictional support club for adopted children aged 5-11. The book is intended  not only for social workers, counsellors or therapists working with children in this age bracket, but also for adoptive parents.

Being an adoptive parent myself, I was glad to see that it stretches to no more than 45 pages, and  as it's a simple read,I was able get through a first reading quite easily over a cup of coffee while my youngsters attended a sports club after school. 

Mrs Bright, the counselor at the Adoption Club, is the main character and she takes you through the social histories of the different children who attend the club. A wide range of children from different backgrounds and experiences are described in child friendly language and while the individual characters may not exactly match the particular children you are working with, they are general enough to find common similarities with the type of child likely to be encountered in any school or club settings today.

Each  character description  provides a follow up  section where feelings can be explored and questions recorded. Such as feelings of separation and loss of a sibling,  being an only child  or inheriting a new brother or sister and the emotional conflict that this brings.  I found that these exercises provide good story starters for my children who find it difficult to begin expressing their thoughts openly and  who find the security of talking through the personality of a third person reassuring.

As second timer newly adoptive dads we had a giggle when we read about the ups downs of having a new wee brother join the family.  It was reassuring  to think that the exhibited behaviours we are witnessing at home are no more than the normal readjustment interactions between two boys getting used to having to share time and space, and that our boys, much like those boys depicted at the club, are going through all this too. Its not only just us!

This book provides an easy to read set of activities which you can choose to work through with your child or young person or just to pick up from when relationships need to be explored a little further.  Failing that you could always all just sit down on the couch and watch an episode of Modern Family on the TV together!
 
-An Adoptive Dad.