Book of the Month February 2018 - Everyday Parenting with Security and Love

Everyday Parenting with Security and Love: Using PACE to Provide Foundations for Attachment. by Kim S . Golding
 
Everyday parenting with Security and Love is written primarily for parents of children and young people who have experienced developmental trauma and also for the practitioners working with them. The book uses Kim Golding’s Foundations of Attachment Model as a structure to strengthen our understanding of the impact that these experiences can have on children’s development as well as how, through the power of our relationships, we can begin to build an emotional connection with them.
 
Everyday parenting with Security and Love offers the reader an incredibly rich and comprehensive explanation of concepts and theories including: attachment theory; the theory of inter-subjectivity; the impact of trauma on development; Dyadic Developmental Practice (DDP) - informed therapeutic parenting; blocked care and blocked trust.  This fusion of current thinking is combined with practical examples and illustrations which are skilfully woven together to create an engaging read.  Each chapter provides a summary of the concepts covered and the glossary of key concepts covered. This ensures that the content is not overwhelming.
 
Very early on in the book, we are introduced to some fictional children and their parents. These families reappear at various points throughout the book in order to provide illustrative examples of some of the concepts discussed. This approach served to intensify the reader’s understanding of and empathy for the lived-experience of the families. Although the families are fictional, they are completely relatable and brought a pragmatism and texture to the book.

​As we journey with them through the book, we find our connection with them growing stronger as our understanding of the complexity of the inner world of both children and their parents deepens. In this way we come to, not only gain an understanding of the concepts contained within the foundations of attachment model, but we also come to experience the impact that PACE can have on relationships.  

Everyday Parenting with Security and Love is interlaced with a tone of acceptance and understanding. The importance of self care is a valuable feature of the book.  It is this sense of acceptance and realism that gives the reader the security to begin to reflect on their own relationships.
 
Throughout Everyday parenting with Security and Love, the author’s knowledge, skill, experience and warmth is evident. This book ultimately offers the reader a message of hope: “Marian knows that there will be plenty of difficult times ahead, but she dares to think that maybe she can do this after all.” 

Elisa Mitchell
Educational Psychologist
Clackmannanshire Educational Psychology Service

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